This movie sucks
#1
Posted 18 April 2009 - 08:26 PM
and http://www.sliceofsc...f-scifi-review/ (second opinion)
In a fantasy world, 'Knights of Bloodsteel' would be good
But in reality, this Sci Fi movie is bad, bad, bad, from the script to the directing to the acting.
Imagine, if you will, that Peter Jackson offered, as an Internet sweepstakes prize or part of a school silent auction, the opportunity to visit the costume and prop collections from "Lord of the Rings" and keep anything that could be shoved into a cart in, say, 30 minutes.
Imagine the person who won then decided to wrangle a bunch of friends, many of whom seem to have received their only acting experience through local Renaissance Faires, into making a movie. Imagine one of those friends somehow knew Christopher Lloyd and managed to convince him that if Ian McKellen and Michael Gambon could don fantasy-flavored robes and silver wig hats and still deliver commanding performances then he could too.
Got it? Well, now you can watch it on Sci Fi, but only if you literally have nothing else to do. "Knights of Bloodsteel" is so bad it's not even good-bad, it's just bad-bad.
The four-hour, two-part movie tells the tale of Mirabilis, a mythical land chock full of humans, elves and goblins in which the only thing of value, apparently, is a magical metal called bloodsteel. What little remains is controlled by the awful and horrible Dragon Eye (Mark Gibbon), a monster so ridiculously hideous he looks like he was drafted from a later episode of "The Power Rangers."
There is, as luck would have it, a magic crucible that produces vast quantities of bloodsteel. To ensure that Dragon Eye doesn't find it first, elven elder Tesselink (Lloyd) teams two humans, an elf and a goblin to seek and possibly destroy the crucible.
All of which sounds much more interesting than it actually is. Sam Egan's script is trite and sophomoric, the acting beyond dismal -- David James Elliott, late of "JAG," plays John Serragoth but insists on employing an accent that moves from Irish to Welsh to Brooklyn, often within the same sentence -- and so many visuals are lifted from "Lord of the Rings" that director Philip Spink should be ashamed of himself.
The bad guys are nothing but Orc rip-offs and speak in those deep electronically modified tones so beloved of cartoons. And as the "hot" elf Perfidia, Natassia Malthe ("BloodRayne II: Deliverance") is strangely graceless; every time she pulls out her two swords, you're fairly certain she will cut off her own head. Forget the bloodsteel, Perfidia; a little WD-40 works wonders.
It's heartbreaking to see Sci Fi, which just wrapped up the righteous and dignified genre classic "Battlestar Galactica," offer this as its idea of fantasy. In the post-"LOTR," "Harry Potter" world, you've just got to do better than this.
#2
Posted 19 April 2009 - 09:48 PM
and http://www.sliceofsc...f-scifi-review/ (second opinion)
In a fantasy world, 'Knights of Bloodsteel' would be good
But in reality, this Sci Fi movie is bad, bad, bad, from the script to the directing to the acting.
It is impossible to argue with this review. I actually managed 1/2 hour and now feel the need of an acid bath because a shower just wouldn't be enough.
#3
Posted 19 April 2009 - 10:55 PM
This movie should go straight to the $5 basket at walmart.
#4
Posted 20 April 2009 - 08:52 AM
Now on to you two guys. How long have you been watching SciFi? Do you know what types of movies they play? No offense to SciFi I actually like their corny B-movies and haven't missed more than a couple this year. Anyway what were you expecting?
#5
Posted 20 April 2009 - 09:13 AM
That series was greatness.
#6
Posted 20 April 2009 - 09:32 AM
#7
Posted 20 April 2009 - 09:44 AM
This one is more like their saturday night movies.
#8
Posted 20 April 2009 - 11:21 AM
I choked through the majority of the film, but fell asleep before the last 20 minutes of it.
I think it is rather disappointing after the whole buildup, a month of waiting, and then this.
What exactly is the purpose of the bloodsteel anyway? Watching this show made me think of a bunch of drug addicts in the way characters reacted at the mention of the stuff.
To be honest, I think I'd rather watch WWE Raw tonight instead of catching the whole Bloodsteel nonsense.
#9
Posted 20 April 2009 - 01:54 PM
#10
Posted 20 April 2009 - 09:17 PM
and http://www.sliceofsc...f-scifi-review/ (second opinion)
In a fantasy world, 'Knights of Bloodsteel' would be good
But in reality, this Sci Fi movie is bad, bad, bad, from the script to the directing to the acting.
Imagine, if you will, that Peter Jackson offered, as an Internet sweepstakes prize or part of a school silent auction, the opportunity to visit the costume and prop collections from "Lord of the Rings" and keep anything that could be shoved into a cart in, say, 30 minutes.
Imagine the person who won then decided to wrangle a bunch of friends, many of whom seem to have received their only acting experience through local Renaissance Faires, into making a movie. Imagine one of those friends somehow knew Christopher Lloyd and managed to convince him that if Ian McKellen and Michael Gambon could don fantasy-flavored robes and silver wig hats and still deliver commanding performances then he could too.
Got it? Well, now you can watch it on Sci Fi, but only if you literally have nothing else to do. "Knights of Bloodsteel" is so bad it's not even good-bad, it's just bad-bad.
The four-hour, two-part movie tells the tale of Mirabilis, a mythical land chock full of humans, elves and goblins in which the only thing of value, apparently, is a magical metal called bloodsteel. What little remains is controlled by the awful and horrible Dragon Eye (Mark Gibbon), a monster so ridiculously hideous he looks like he was drafted from a later episode of "The Power Rangers."
There is, as luck would have it, a magic crucible that produces vast quantities of bloodsteel. To ensure that Dragon Eye doesn't find it first, elven elder Tesselink (Lloyd) teams two humans, an elf and a goblin to seek and possibly destroy the crucible.
All of which sounds much more interesting than it actually is. Sam Egan's script is trite and sophomoric, the acting beyond dismal -- David James Elliott, late of "JAG," plays John Serragoth but insists on employing an accent that moves from Irish to Welsh to Brooklyn, often within the same sentence -- and so many visuals are lifted from "Lord of the Rings" that director Philip Spink should be ashamed of himself.
The bad guys are nothing but Orc rip-offs and speak in those deep electronically modified tones so beloved of cartoons. And as the "hot" elf Perfidia, Natassia Malthe ("BloodRayne II: Deliverance") is strangely graceless; every time she pulls out her two swords, you're fairly certain she will cut off her own head. Forget the bloodsteel, Perfidia; a little WD-40 works wonders.
It's heartbreaking to see Sci Fi, which just wrapped up the righteous and dignified genre classic "Battlestar Galactica," offer this as its idea of fantasy. In the post-"LOTR," "Harry Potter" world, you've just got to do better than this.
That is your opinion and you are entitled to it. I have to disagree that this movie sucks. And FYI, that version of Battlestar Galactica was a joke. The writers for that series strayed so far from the original series, so much so that it was nothing like the original. The only good thing about the new Battlestar Galactica was that it finally came to an end.
#11
Posted 20 April 2009 - 09:23 PM
#12
Posted 22 April 2009 - 12:09 AM
Review: Knights of Bloodsteel [http://mepoorgamer.tumblr.com/]
I’d say, all of but the second part of the two part series and any of the scenes that included the evil Dragon Eye, (at least until the end of the movie) was crapp. It reminded me of a lord of the rings noch-off so badly done that it was more like watching a Power Rangers show. It did have a good story, but the dialog was so badly written that I felt bad for the actors.
The cast did a decent job; Christopher Lloyd did well as a sorcerer. It’s nice to see that he’s still around doing movies. The rest of the Knights did well to portray their roles, as well, even with the crappy dialog. Note that David Elliott looked the part - though weaving in and out of the right voice - I still couldn’t stop myself from seeing him as the Jag officer. He still made for a pretty good “bad asss” Assassin.
The CG work was a bit better than most B rated movies. I’m looking forward to when these things can look even better. Unfortunately, the small number of extras in the movie was noticeable and some of the scenes did look like there were done on a set. The lack of money was probably due to the hiring of several of the bigger named actors. The considerable amount of CG work must have also been made at considerable cost.
Overall, this movie could have been better. Why not just cut its length in half? Especially, if they had removed about 90% of the Dragon Eye scenes - I ended up fast forwarding through these parts because I just didn’t care. If they could have also spend more time on fewer CG scenes, fixed the dialog, removed 90% of the first of the movie, and perhaps added instead a small scene for the back-story to John the Assassin and a small scene for a little back-story to Tesselink, (for Character development); this movie could have been something.
All that being said, I did find the second half entertaining. I especially appreciated the dragon burning the map causing Perfidia’s struggle to deal with her failure, John at her side - an example of rich character development. Adric and Ber-Lak side stories were also an added benefit to the story but very predictable. Oh, and Gardiner Miller made for a good evil elf, orc, goblin, or whatever he was supposed to be. As a side note, I’m so glad that this was recorded because I never would have made through all of the commercials otherwise.
Cast page: [http://www.scifi.com/bloodsteel/cast/]
#13
Posted 25 April 2009 - 11:59 PM
I have seen all Legend of the Seeker episodes and this show is a bit different:) recommended!
#14
Posted 26 April 2009 - 06:12 PM
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